"The Last Song" All American Rejects

Hopefully today's meeting was the last about this job. He said he'd called the 'bean-counters' and lobbied heavily in my favor. "Can we meet him halfway at least?" I appreciated this. This was to earn my trust. He then appealed to my perceived inexperience by saying, "You're making a very big mistake." He then appealed to my ego by saying, "I know by your DNA that you'll feel hollow if you returned to your old job. You have a great deal of pride in your work. The reason you had this opportunity in the first place is because of your work ethic and intelligence." He then called me an "Indian giver" and turned around and he then used intimidation by saying, "I don't know if anything else will come up for you, we're a very petty and vindictive department." He made a comment about me missing the bus and maybe this spot will be already taken by somebody else.

People who've made it in this company are people who are competent, persistent, but ultimately unambitious. Their success is attributable to their ability to slide into the status quo, their advancement is the result of a sequence of accidents that finds them at the right time at the right place. For a company this size, whose financial philosophy is very conservative, this structure works well. Improvements are made on a glacial pace, as a matter of evolution. Shifting paradigms is not in their interests. They cannot take these risks.

What I've learned about myself: If ego is unjustified confidence, then mine is big. There's no reason for me to believe I will be successful in a job whose prerequisite skills are nowhere to be found on my resume. But I just believe that I can. I was not intimidated by any part of this process and I'm proud of myself for that. I also saw an extremely competitive part of me that sometimes clouded my better judgement. I sometimes wanted to win so badly that I lost sight of the issues and interests that were on the table. I need to keep this in check because it's a hazardous quality in these situations. I realized that I can get stressed out and overworked, but that something switches right before showtime. I'm interested more in being respected than liked, but I also learned that it hurts me a great deal when people don't like me. I've found another tone in my voice, a stronger firmer one. I realized my patience is selective. I have a great deal with people I like. I have very little for those I don't. I realized that it is possible to fight for what I want and stay respectful.